Today. Yesterday. Future.

I have felt the pain.

I have seen the destruction.

I have witnessed the demoralization.

I have watched them flee.

The pain of no one there.

The debilitating thought of trusting.

Yet, I have learned.

There is One who holds my past, present and future.

However, I hold it close to my vest, like I think I can control it.

Fear is crippling.

I did not do enough.

Was I ever enough?

So many questions.

God.

My only true supporter.

He wants me.

Even when the others do not.

Why do I run from Him?

This is who I am.

The good, the bad, and the ugly.

Why can’t anyone see that?

I want to quit fighting.

I want to give up.

Yet, my Father in Heaven keeps pulling me back.

Why?

Each day is anew.

I know this.

However, each day I breathe, is one more breath

I know soon I will not take.

Fear of death used to cripple me.

Now...I have learned…

No matter what I do, say or become…

I have been judged.

The pain will subside….maybe. I am only human. But...

My destiny only depends on the One that controls it.

And I pray I will be in the kingdom of no

more tears or pain.

Till then….head down, pray, and hope.

Love, Hope and Blessings…

In Him Alone-

April

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Life as I knew it....

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His Design for my life

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